Relative Dimensions

Doctor Who Magazine is a publication that inspires great loyalty in its readership. Many of us have read it from childhood onwards. I’m one of those long-term readers, although I did have a non-fan blip for a few years in my late teens/early twenties when things like exams and boys temporarily took over my brain. But I came back into the fold eventually, and I can’t tell you how exciting it was to actually become part of the magazine with the Time Team. Then, later on, I got to write the celebratory Countdown to 50! That was, fairly obviously, going to come to an end – but I wanted to keep writing for DWM! Writing a column on Who and families was actually my husband’s idea. I really wasn’t sure that readers would be particularly interested in the minutiae of my family life – it’s more a Sunday supplement sort of thing than a science-fiction mag thing – but he said to at least suggest it to Tom Spilsbury, DWM’s editor, so I did. And he liked it! (Or, possibly, was desperately in need of something to fill the slot. I’m not going to enquire which.) My poor children. They had their birth announced in DWM (how many children get that?!), they’ve appeared in its pages dressed in Dalek and Cyberman costumes, and now they have to suffer my presenting them with a DVD and demanding ‘Watch this and say something funny or meaningful!’ every time a deadline approaches…

(NB Some of the columns reproduced here are in their original, unedited state.)

Reproduced by kind permission of Doctor Who Magazine.

Illustrations courtesy of Ben Morris and Doctor Who Magazine. Check out more of Ben’s fabulous work on Facebook and Tumblr

DWM 493 Girl, Resurrected 9th November, 2015It’s 9.20am on Sunday 18 October 2015 and my husband is laughing at me. I wouldn’t say being laughed at […]

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DWM 492 Who’s Magic? 12th October, 2015Back in 2011, we were introduced to a new mystery. What, we wondered, was ‘the first question. The oldest question […]

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DWM 491 Doc Holiday! 16th September, 2015Homework. I’ve never been a fan of it. I pretty much always did it, being something of a goody-goody, but […]

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DWM 490 Trails & Tribulations 18th August, 2015Husband is watching Wimbledon. I, having zero interest in tennis, am paying little attention to the television. “Wish we were […]

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DWM 489 Seasons in the Sun 20th July, 2015Last week, my children’s homework was to come up with words and phrases associated with autumn. It’s June. That seemed […]

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DWM 488 Thanks 40 Memories 25th June, 2015Last night Fan Twin came in and said he wanted to talk to me about how Adrian died. I was […]

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DWM 487 The New Recruits 28th May, 2015Husband and I have reached The Curse of Fenric in our watchthrough. This story is especially dear to husband’s heart […]

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DWM 486 A Distressing Question 28th April, 2015You know those optical illusions, the ones where you stare very hard at a while vase until it turns into […]

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DWM 485 What if You Turn Right? 26th March, 2015Yesterday I learned how to meditate. We did at one point have to go ‘OMMMM’. I would wager that a […]

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DWM 484 Learning to Let Go 4th March, 2015You might possibly recall that Fan Twin and Non-Fan Twin started cubs recently. This is the thing about twins, they […]

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DWM 483 Outside the Box 2nd February, 2015‘Leslie Grantham.’ ‘Obviously. Ooh, and the woman who killed Dirty Den. Tracy Ann Oberman.’ ‘June Brown.’ ‘Louise Jameson was in […]

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DWM 482 We Will Do Our Best! 7th January, 2015The boys will be starting Cubs in the new year (in fact they are due to be at their very […]

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DWM 481 Unconditional Love 10th December, 2014Dear Santa, For Christmas, please could you bring world peace, a cure for all illnesses and Mission to the Unknown […]

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DWM 480 The Late Show 12th November, 2014No, you can’t go to bed. You have to stay up and watch television. Oh, what a topsy-turvy world we […]

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DWM 479 Ignorance is Bliss 13th October, 2014New Doctor Who: how do you watch yours? Obviously the answer is ‘I just sit in front of the telly […]

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DWM 478 Chatty and That… 15th September, 2014I need to write a DWM column. Fast! But what to say? Here I am, on holiday, typing on a […]

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DWM 477 Through New Eyes… 18th August, 2014We have a new telly! It’s been a few years since we had a fully functioning television – the old […]

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DWM 476 Know the Score 23rd July, 2014The World Cup starts today! My today that is, not yours. Is it over yet where you are? Did England […]

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DWM 475 Urgent Calls… 24th June, 2014We are a family of habit, and one of our nicest traditions is to trundle down to Bournemouth every Easter […]

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DWM 474 The Votes are In! 28th May, 2014Our Who-watch has reached Underworld. The Doctor Who Magazine poll results are still being compiled as I write, but a […]

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DWM 473 A Bad Effect? 29th April, 2014Invasion of the Dinosaurs. It’s a good story, but those dinosaurs are just embarrassing. Except… Fan Twin watched it a […]

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DWM 472 Time to Change 31st March, 2014Peter Capaldi’s costume has been revealed. ‘Ooh la la!’ said Non-Fan Twin upon seeing it, although I wouldn’t take that […]

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DWM 471 Favourite Things 3rd March, 2014In the olden days when I went to a lot of conventions, the extreme happiness of being among likeminded lovely […]

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DWM 470 To Tell the Truth 5th February, 2014In the car the other day, Fan Twin started to talk about the Doctor’s family, but ran out after Susan […]

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DWM 469 TV Magic! 7th January, 2014I would have started writing this column earlier today, but my laptop was commandeered by certain children so they could […]

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DWM 468 Christmas Cheers! 12th December, 2013T S Eliot’s Prufrock measured out his life with coffee spoons. We can measure ours with Doctor Who Christmas specials… […]

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DWM 467 That’s What Counts 12th November, 2013Last week husband and I celebrated our tenth wedding anniversary. We felt ridiculously proud that we’d continued to like each […]

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DWM 467 One Year Anniversary 12th November, 2013AUTHOR’S NOTE: This was written for a special anniversary pull-out DWM that came with issue 467, imagining the magazine as […]

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DWM 466 End of Part One 15th October, 2013Fan Twin is watching a lot of Doctor Who at the moment. His time is basically divided between school, sleep, […]

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DWM 465 Looking Forward 12th September, 2013Husband and I have been arguing. You see, I thought Peter Capaldi was definitely going to be the new Doctor, […]

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DWM 464 Bad Behaviour! 19th August, 2013There is a particular version of Sod’s Law reserved especially for Doctor Who fans. It is this: whenever you sit […]

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DWM 463 Guess Who? 18th July, 2013The free gift in this week’s (at time of writing) Doctor Who Adventures is ‘Doctor Who?’, a version of the […]

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DWM 462 Girl, Interrupted 27th June, 2013Most fans of a certain age will be able to reel you off a list of Doctor Who episodes that […]

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DWM 461 The End of Time 23rd May, 2013Several years ago, three-quarters of DWM’s Time Team went on a day trip to Leeds Castle, to celebrate reaching The […]

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DWM 460 Family Fortunes 1st May, 2013According to Plato, every soul knows everything that has ever existed, even prior to birth. By this reckoning (and to […]

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DWM 459 My Cool Craze 4th April, 2013I need to make a confession. Right now, this column is coming to you under false pretences. You see, just […]

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DWM 458 The Doctor Ordered… 7th March, 2013My husband and I recently started a mission: to watch all of Doctor Who. In order. From the start. Now, […]

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DWM 457 Past and Present 4th February, 2013Happy Christmas! (I’m sorry, but in the timey-wimey world of magazine publishing deadlines it’s still Christmas 2012. You could always […]

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DWM 456 Sons of Mine 10th January, 2013So, we were playing the alphabet game. I expect you’ve played it too, one of the simplest passing-the-time games there […]

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